top of page
Writer's pictureJamiliah Paschal-Smith

Sobriety, Salvation, and Self-Love: Overcoming addiction at any age

Updated: Mar 9

Trigger Warning: Child Abuse, Sexual Assault, Drug Use, Incest, Rape


I have finally reached a point in my life where I can proudly say that I am 55 years old and 10 months sober. This is the longest period of sobriety I have achieved since I was just 16 years old. For the majority of my life, I believed that my addiction was a result of the trauma I had experienced. However, it was during my time in rehab that I truly learned about the disease of addiction and alcoholism. My journey towards recovery has been a tumultuous one, filled with heartache and pain. At the tender age of four, I was taken away from my parents due to my father's addiction and my mother's physical abuse towards my little sister. It was a devastating blow, and I carried the weight of that separation with me for years. As if that wasn't enough, at the age of 10, I was subjected to the horrifying experience of being molested by my own grandfather. The innocence of my childhood was shattered, and I struggled to make sense of the world around me. The trauma continued to haunt me, and in college, I became a victim of rape. The pain and shame I felt were unbearable, and I turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms to numb my emotions. Over the years, I endured the heartbreak of seven miscarriages, each one taking a toll on my mental and emotional well-being. To cope with the overwhelming grief, I began taking benzodiazepines, which only served to further entangle me in the clutches of addiction. To make matters worse, I underwent two knee replacements, and the pain led me down a dangerous path of opioid addiction. These powerful drugs hijacked my life, leaving me trapped in a cycle of dependency and despair. It seemed as though there was no way out. But then, I found salvation in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). Through the support and guidance of fellow members, I embarked on the 12-step program, determined to reclaim my life. The fellowship became my lifeline, providing me with the tools and community I needed to overcome my addiction. Today, I can confidently say that AA has saved my life. I have diligently worked through each of the 12 steps, confronting my past, making amends, and finding a newfound sense of spirituality. The fellowship has become an integral part of my life, and I am deeply involved in supporting others on their own journeys to recovery. With each passing day, I feel a sense of liberation and joy that I haven't experienced in decades. I have my life back, and I am finally free from the chains of addiction. The darkness that once consumed me has been replaced by a glimmer of hope and a renewed sense of purpose. While the scars of my past will always remain, I am now equipped with the strength and resilience to face life's challenges head-on. Sobriety has given me the clarity to appreciate the beauty in the world and the love that surrounds me. I am happier than I have been in years, and I am eternally grateful for the second chance at life that recovery has granted me. Submitted by: Lisa C.

Comments


bottom of page